So I have been with Nathan a year and a half (18 months) and we have had a really good relationship so far, we are pretty strong and a good example of an army relationship. The most irritating thing is the time apart but at the same time it gives us space to miss each other and get excited to see each other. Honestly though that is NOTHING compared to a bigger issue at the minute...
So me and Nathan have been engaged for nearly a month and a half and it is an amazing feeling. I get to look at a ring everyday and think 'I have a fiance' but this is the cause of the problem. So you know most of the time the way it goes, a couple that have been together normally a while and they get engaged well for some massive reason in mine and Nathan's life that is A HUGE PROBLEM!
Everyone is telling me 'Zoe don't listen to them don't get worked up' but it just annoys me so much! Me and Nathan have been through a lot in 18 months, I won't go into full detail because some things I want to keep private but most of all we deal with long distance normally a 200 mile (4 hours away) distance during the week. A long with finding a house, thinking about a family and a wedding. We decided already that we won't be getting married for 4/5 years, but we really want our own place to just be ourselves and not have people watching us all the time.
I love interior design so the thought of a home to decorate makes me so happy! But it's hard when I would live their full time and Nathan would be at camp unless i moved down to camp with him and we got a home there. So basically I would be on my own 5 days out of the week apart or sometimes longer.
Me and Nathan wouldn't have spoke about getting engaged and having a family if we weren't committed 100% so why is it anyone else's problem? is it affecting them? no, is it messing with their life? no. So why are certain people so concerned, it comes across a lot of jealousy because me and Nathan know we are a strong couple and no one else can get engaged or married because we cant have a grown up lifestyle. Getting engaged does not mean we will have kids, get married, move far far away and never speak to anyone ever again. It means we are committed to each other and wanna support each and say we want one person for the rest of our lives to love.
I would think getting engaged is less commitment than a baby, I mean a baby means our lives change forever and we are parents and take on a human life to care for and teach. Whereas an engagement is a ring on a finger and promise to get married that's it. I would LOVE for one day for every couple to try mine and Nathan's relationship, because they would not cope with 4 months of it. I think it's so condescending and belittling to say to a couple 'you haven't been through enough' when I deal with more than they could ever imagine, I wouldn't wish a deployment on anyone but it's obvious not my side but Nathan's side of friends that they think our relationship isn't mature enough.
I put it down to jealousy, and pure pettiness of 'well they cant get engaged because I am and I'm the only person who can ever be engaged' simply grow up. I've got to the point I don't care anymore and I'll openly say I'm engaged and there's nothing they do to change it. Life goes on, this has bothered me for such a long time that I need somewhere to write it all down before i lost my marbles...
SO from now on I look it as 'if there is a problem with mine and Nathan's relationship/engagement then you go take his place at work while I spend time with him, because they are clearly taking there simply cushy relationships for granted while I have to toughest kind!
Well, rant over thanks my lovelies,
All my love,
A very peeved
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