Maybe I am a little stress head and things get to me easily but I am a little irritated. So Nathan has been in the field driving his vehicle which he named after me yaaaaay for a week and he has another five days to do. All I honestly want is for him to come home so we can have a cuddle and just have a smile that is genuine because all I ever do is smile when I am around him. Honestly though what really pees me off is the bloody interference, yes I am swearing which I never do! EVER especially on my blog because it's not fair on you to read it.
I do nothing but try to help people I'm the first to offer to do the job no one wants to do, but the minute I want time alone with my boyfriend I get grief. Me and Nathan are a pretty strong couple and I have to hide A LOT! So for a start people aren't happy we are engaged and I'm not talking creepy ex girlfriends or anything but like people that NEVER speak to me or Nathan. Telling his family that we have a 'toxic relationship' and it shows on things like Facebook that we argue a lot (TOTAL CRAP!).
Just to clarify me and Nathan tag each other in a lot of things like jokes and stuff like 'would you slap your ex for £1,000,000' and Nathan's like 'I'd slap Zoe for that' honestly I found it funny because I know he wouldn't and he would hit someone to defend me. However, this is where people are twisting things saying things like 'Nathan must get mad at me to want to do that' IT'S A JOKE!!!!!
Honestly it's pathetic when you think of it in my perspective because me and Nathan can't have a little tiff about something minor like him tickling me and I get mad. That leads to us apparently 'always arguing' okay JOKE ARGUMENTS ARE JOKES that's why the word joke is there. People are coming to Nathan being shady saying they think we should postpone our engagement because we are not ready when I have lived 2 years of training, weeks on end apart, lonely nights, heartbreak, loss and missing important dates. ARMY SPOUSES ARE BRAVE PEOPLE!
Try any longer than a few weeks without the person you see EVERYDAY then tell me it's not hard not having a kiss when you want or a cuddle IT SUCKS! I do not give a toss for anyones opinion on my relationship but it starts to grate on you when people think they are entitled to b/s opinions. I have honestly stopped caring and respecting people for their opinions because me and Nathan are each others support systems that aren't family. We are each others family, he calls me his new family and that warms my heart so much because I have a tiny family.
All I want is to just be happy with Nathan and I can't actually announce on social media we are engaged because then people go 'no they aren't they have a bad relationship' were any of these people there when he got on one knee and asked me to marry him? NOPE! I have been through some horrible things in my life that I would never wish on a human being and all I wished for when this happened was for someone to look after me and fix me. Nathan has 100% done that he fixed that part of me that made me think I could never love another person because i was treated badly by men.
I always have my families support and they support me 100%, but when I have people saying bad things about my relationship it just gets me down because Nathan has been the nicest guy to walk into my life. He was the one who mentioned marriage and kids and I thought about it and agreed that's what I wanted a little early but I wanted that. He bought a ring that was over £2,000 and I never thought anyone would pay that much for me ever especially on a ring, all I want is to be happy and wear my ring with pride because it is beautiful. We have honestly grown together from 18 year olds to 20 year olds and I love him more than ever. I am proud of all her does and I am so happy he is my forever. Without crying and asking people to leave me alone there isn't much I can do apart from say things to peoples faces.
Come home safe Nathan and sooner rather than later.
Agh well, this has made me a bit better because I'm not as worked up.
thanks for reading my lovelies,
All my love,
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